Today has been a day that I'll probably remember for quite some time - a day that truly made me realize how mature Kailer has become since June. The first month and a half of dropping Kailer off at his "new school"(I should note that almost 5 months later it's still his 'new' school) left my heart feeling shredded as I dropped him off and heard him crying as I walked out the door. Those days faded to a few small tears shed and then slowly progressing to a hug, "I love you" and out the door as he worked his way toward his friends. More recently it's all I can do to get him to even tell me Good-bye before he's ready to hit the turf running and join in the day's activities. It's even gotten to the point where he's asking to go on the weekend; to which I have to explain to him that it's closed and neither his friends nor his teachers would be there. So today, I got Kailer to school and Miss Alison (the owner) was there so I stayed for a few extra minutes to chat with her and catch up on what's been going on in her life with her three children. I noticed a couple of different times that Kailer kept glancing our way and never really made his way into any of the 3-4 play groups that had formed. After a few minutes he comes up to me and all that I hear very softly is, "Mommy..." "What honey? I can't hear you." I inched a bit closer to him, but still couldn't hear what he was saying. Finally I got down to his level and he said, "I love you." Now you're thinking 'Oh how sweet!' To which I would reply, yes, it was very sweet, but the tone of his voice and the way he said it to me, it was almost like he was saying to me, "It's okay Mom, you can go now." It really made me realize how independent he has become - he's definitely ready to be his own little person .... obviously without Mommy around!
Days like today pull a bit at my heart strings as I reflect upon the past 2+ years and realize that the baby that once fully depended on ME is now moving on, making friends and learning lots of new social skills from his peers. The transformation of this little person seems to have happened before my very eyes! So tonight as I was leaving his room after our bedtime routine (which, by the way, is one thing that has NOT changed in all this time .... he still loves books and songs!) I unplugged the baby monitor - sort of my last "lifeline" to the baby that he's not. I think for the past several months I've kept it on for my sake, definitely not for his! Since he's moved into his new room he doesn't cry in the middle of the night needing me. No, instead, he just marches his way down into my room to let me know what he needs. I hate to blink - it just goes too fast!
Kailer's Elmo pumpkin - courtesy of Grandpa!
He is so very excited for Halloween this year and with a party to attend and trick-or-treating events planned I hope to capture some good moments with the camera.
